Movie Review: Shark Night (aka hot shirtless undergrads get eaten)

Shark Night

FX PhotoStudio ImageSeriously, the worst movie I have seen in a long time.  Don't cross it off your list, if you actually have it on one.

Said list of course looks something like this:
-wine coolers
-tell mom I'm spending the weekend @church camp
-go to mall for sexy outfit from Victoria Secrets (ask dad for his cc)
-get nails done
-study for psych exam on drive to party

When my 25 year old BIL asked in a shocked huh tone "Shark Night was a bad movie???" I knew those under 25 will enjoy it!

For you young whipper-snappers,  this movie is better than clown porn for a party where cheap booze, lots of "Oh my god"s, hugs, crying, and hopes of hooking up is in plenty.

For an old timer like myself, the movie from its cover to the end is text book college thesis film predictable.   Don't get me wrong while watching, I proudly felt like a dirty old lady enjoying the shirtless boys with all the six pack abs, bulging biceps, and those sexy-ass "V" shaped muscles by their waistbands...but I digress.

Let me outline the movie for you:
  • College kids
    • white, rich chic, with secrets
    • white, poor, med student, uber smart
    • black, star athlete, friends with poor white med student
    • white, Abercrombie asshole probably pseudo wealthy who's best subject is himself, nude model for an art class.
    • latina love interest of the star athlete
    • dorky white dude with his own style and comedic demeanour covering a damaged self esteem and yearning to be like the others
    • Katharine McPhee from American Idol fame who hits its with the nude model
  • They all go away for a weekend to celebrate the star athlete's B+  at the rich white chic's house.  In my book that ain't worth celebrating but I'm old, maybe B's are the new A's. 
    • Said house is on an isolated island in the bayous of Louisiana
    • The townies are pervs
    • the only way to her house is via boat
    • no cell service at the island house is stressed too many times
  • The star athlete gets eaten first, then his Latina lover. Not to spoil the remainder of the shark buffet, in the end 2 are left standing, the bad guys get kicked by karma, and the sharks are still in the water.
The hubs and I seriously were laughing throughout the movie at its ridiculousness-I had tears in my eyes from laughing so hard.  If you are 25 and under I recommend this film.  If you are not-well, see for yourself so you can decide.

*I received a review copy of this film from Fox Home Entertainment/Think Jam Publicity. Please all my nice contacts there, don't black list me for this review. I'm sure you knew the movie sucked but you are in the industry of selling them, I get it. This turd is as polished as it can get. So, back to disclaiming. No monies were exchanged and I was not requested to give a glowing review...obviously. All opinions are MY OWN and this movie should not reflect poorly on anyone involved in its making and distribution, dudes.*

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